| | +Bye Bye Xanga+
"kill me faster"
...jesus christ. i cant stop thinking about how terribly alone i'm going to be next year. i can't stop thinking about how fucking alone i am right now. i thank everyone whos been trying to help me...don't think your words have fallen on deaf ears...but i really am in a very dark place right now. you did make me feel better for a little while, though. it just all comes rushing back to me. i dont have the strength. i don't have the will. i don't want to continue living like this anymore. ...wont somebody come and love me? ...no. that's too much to ask. because i am a fat ugly bitch. ugly ugly so fucking ugly.
anyway. this is me saying goodbye to most of my online life. most especially xanga. i can't stand to even sit here and even try to pretend to be happy anymore. maybe a month or two away....who knows. now i can 100% dedicate my days to sleeping and being a fucking miserable worm. don't worry though. it's only the fucking internet right? i'll just disappear and you won't even care...that's the thing about the computer...it's so impersonal. detached. be that as it may...i surely will miss you all and reading in on your lives...you're all so much more beautiful and interesting than i am anyhow. oh and if anyone for some godforsaken reason asks where i am. tell them i died fighting a rabid bear or something cool like that.
another night of crying myself to sleep.
"i hope i choke on my tears and drown."
<3 kthnx.
[whats that noise?] inside of love :: nada surf |
| | Posted 6/8/2003 1:10 AM - 41 Views - 20 eProps - 11 comments
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I hope you decide to come back eventually. 
